Yesterday morning I sat in my car outside my attorney’s office, wiping the tears off my face. In my purse, were the signed documents ending my marriage effective today. There is a sense of relief to put some closure on the emotional hell of the past few months, but there is also a sense of loss in the finality of its end. For all the anger, I have towards my ex-husband, it is made sadder by the loss of my partner, my confidant, my lover, and most difficult of all; my best friend.
From my lawyer’s office, I drove to a jewelry store where I traded in my rings and had the diamonds removed to create a ring representing the most important thing I took out of my marriage, my sons. The tears threatened to fall at various moments, but I didn’t want to get rid of these rings in bitterness and anger, I wanted to repurpose them into something beautiful. I look forward to sharing the result!
This week is a week of transition for myself and for my sons. As I close the door on my marriage, I also close the door on my career as an ER nurse, a job I have proudly held for the past 9 years. My last day in the ER is Sunday and, while I may remain in a per diem status in the ER, my actual career is changing. In just over a week I start a job as an RN Case Manager for a major insurance company. I am nervous, but excited. Also, this week will be marked by what would have been our 14th wedding anniversary and the arrival of two of my sisters-in-law for a visit. It is such a strange series of changes, in many ways, but at the same time, it feels right for the wind to be shifting in so many directions at once. Bear with me during this time of transition.